Yikes! We have less than two weeks until Valentine’s Day. If you’re like many of us, you’ve just finished (or started) paying off the bills from Christmas. But Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be about spending a lot of money. Take time to show your lover you really care by giving them the oh-so-important gifts of your time and undivided attention.

Add a few toys from Vibrator.com to make your playtime on Valentine’s Day evening more fun and you’ve got the recipe for a successful holiday celebration. Order now to get delivery by Valentine’s Day.

We’ve compiled a list of our favorite Valentine’s Day picks for every budget. You’ll find the perfect present in every category, and we’ve selected a “steal” and a “splurge” for each one. Whether you want to spend a little or a lot, we’ve got you covered. (Or, um, not covered very much at all, as the case may be… make sure to check out the lingerie!)

Gift Sets

The Steal: Basket of Love: Looking to create a steamy night and still have money left over for champagne? This gift set comes in an adorable red basket and contains massage lotion, Hot Stuff warming massage oil, incense cones to set the mood, edible body paint to play with, and Spanish Fly sex drops to enhance the most romantic night of the year – all for under $20.

The Splurge: Lover’s Choice Enchanted Evening Kit: Everything about this gift set exudes luxury, including the classy box it comes packaged in. Best of all, what is more quintessentially Valentine’s Day than rose petals, champagne flutes, candles and chocolate? Splurge on this kit and you’re all set, with very berry warming massage oil, cocoalicious chocolate body paint (and a paintbrush) glass champagne flutes, scented silk rose petals and four tealights. Plus a guide book with some creative ideas for ways to spend your night.

Vibrators

The Steal: Doc Johnson’s Candy Ripples: Candy and Valentine’s Day just go together. For only $13, Doc Johnson’s 6.5-inch textured Candy Ripples vibrator will leave you with enough left over to splurge on some chocolate in a heart-shaped box, as well. This vibrator comes in a choice of three iridescent colors perfect for Valentine’s Day: Hot Pink, Purple Passion and Ivory Drop.

The Splurge: Lelo INA: You can’t go wrong with any of Lelo’s line of  ergonomically designed luxury vibrators. But we especially like the  INA, a dual-action, rabbit-style vibrator with two motors for the ultimate control. (And what lady doesn’t love being in control?) INA features eight variable stimulation modes, and comes in a gift box and satin pouch. Super-silent vibrations last up to 4 hours after a 2-hour charge. If you’re looking for a sex toy that says “class,” look no further than INA.

Toys for the Guys

The Steal: Dr. Joel Kaplan’s Prostate Massager: Priced at just $20, this slim prostate massager offers all the features of more expensive toys.  It’s waterproof, multi-speed, and perfectly shaped for easy prostate stimulation.  At this price, can spring for the extra large bottle of lube, too.

The Splurge: Aneros Helix: If your man has never experienced the joys of prostate massage, make this Valentine’s Day a very memorable “first” for him. And you may as well start him out with one of the best – the Anerox Helix. The only toy of its kind with a patented design, the Aneros Helix provides hands-free anal pleasure for the beginner or novice – alone or with a partner.

Lingerie

The Steal: Sweet Afterthought Babydoll w/ Thong: We love this sexy white and oh-so-revealing baby doll top with matching g-string thong. He’ll know he’s not an afterthought in your mind when you greet him at the door in this sexy ensemble.

Another Deal: Roses are Red Babydoll w/ Thong: We also couldn’t resist, for just a few dollars more, this white babydoll sleepwear set with satin bow and ribbon hem details. It includes a matching thong and a bag of red rose pedals to set the Valentine’s Day mood.

The Splurge: Peek-a-boo set w/ bows: We admit, the lingerie at Vibrator.com is so reasonably priced, it was a challenge to find a splurge! Whatever you choose, you’ll find a deal, with most items $25 and under. Spend just a little bit more, though, and treat someone special to this 3-piece mesh peek-a-boo set with bows. Or buy it for yourself and let your significant other “unwrap” you for Valentine’s Day.

Before the holidays, the Northeast suffered what some people have called the largest snow storm to hit our region in 17 years.  It’s already shaping up to be a long, cold winter.

Of course, the forecast of a blizzard sent people rushing to Wal-mart to stock up on bottled water, batteries, and canned goods. I was lucky enough to grab the last container of milk off the grocery store shelf – not because I was stockpiling, but because I happened to be out of milk. And there was a sale on bread, which explains the six loaves in my freezer. But that’s neither here nor there.

Really… why do people stockpile odd things in the event of a storm? And if we have a power outage, how do they plan to cook all that Campbell’s Chunky soup? I hope they remembered the propane for their camp stove. Wait, what?! Camp stove? You see my point.

Now, your resident blogger and erstwhile survivalist, Desiree Sweet, is here to share the things you REALLY need to stock up on. Because what fun is a snow day unless you can spend it tucked inside where it’s nice and warm?

Four Things Every Sexy Survivalist Needs

Condoms – You don’t want to trudge to the gas station in the middle of a blizzard because you’re down to your last condom, do you? We like this variety pack from Trojan, featuring three each of the Ultra Pleasure, Her Pleasure, and Pleasure Mesh varieties.

How many do you need? First, calculate approximately how many times you have sex each week. Remember, you need a new condom each time you have intercourse, and plan to use two to three times as many as usual during a snow storm or long weekend.

Condoms typically expire about 4 years from the date of production, so you can safely store a year’s supply as long as you remember to rotate your stock. When you buy a new box, place it toward the back of your supply. Older condoms should go in the front and be used first.

Lubricants – Different sex toys and condom materials require different lubricants. For instance, silicone toys should only be used with water-based lubricants. For bath fun, you’ll want a silicone lubricant, since water-based lubricants wash off too easily in the water and don’t provide enough staying power. Keep the following varieties of lube on hand for snowy day adventures:

-    Silicone lubricant – For use with most sex toys, except silicone varieties.
-    Water-based lubricant – For silicone toys
-    Massage oils - Not a lubricant but still important to have for full-body massages after your lover shovels the driveway
-    Warming lubricants - Perfect for those cold winter nights

According to the experts at Cosmopolitan magazine, most lubricants don’t have an expiration date, but it’s smart to use them within a year. I wouldn’t stockpile more than one or two bottles of each variety. Store your lubricants in a cool, dry place and give a quick sniff and look-over before you use them. If anything seems funky, toss it and reach for your back-up bottle.

Batteries – Fortunately, most vibrators are battery-powered, so you can enjoy your toys even in an electrical outage. But you don’t want to steal batteries from your flashlight (or vice versa) during the big storm. Make sure you have plenty of C and AA batteries available (the most common types for most vibes). Rechargable batteries, obviously, are the green solution, but make sure they’re fully charged before the storm hits.

Something to clean up – I love this “after sex towel” but if your power’s out, you won’t be doing laundry. Keep plenty of these in your linen closet, or simply have plenty of tissues on hand for clean up. Perhaps this is where all that bottled water comes in handy.

Rest easy, now that you’re all set for the next sex-filled snow day.

Image is of the F. Y. N. Adult Toybox XL Faux Leather Case courtesy of For Your Nymphomation.

The results of our FREE Order Giveaway are in!  One lucky winner from Fountainville, PA will receive their full order + shipping on us!

The winner purchased the iTap Egg:  a brand new toy from CalExotics that has been generating a lot of  “buzz”.

Thank you to everyone who participated and congratulations to our winner.  Please look out for more promotional offers this year, including more giveaways!

Best Regards,

The Vibrator.com Marketing Team

Since the g-spot was discovered in 1950 by German gynecologist Dr. Ernst Grafenberg it’s been the subject of studies, supposition, sex tips and dispute. In 1982, Beverly Whipple wrote the international bestseller The G Spot and Other Discoveries About Human Sexuality, giving the g-spot its name and newfound fame.

For years, Grafenberg and Whipple were taken at their word. Yes, women have a g-spot. It is a pleasure center and the source of vaginal (as opposed to clitoral) orgasms. But then researchers began poking around. Does the g-spot really exist?

The Finding of the G-Spot
Two years ago, The Journal of Sexual Medicine published the results of a study by an Italian research team that seemed to reveal  evidence of the g-spot’s existence. The researchers studied 20 women by means of a questionnaire and an ultrasound, and spotted a physiological difference between women who achieve vaginal orgasms and those who do not.

A media frenzy ensued. Magazine headlines read “How to find the g-spot!” Sales of specially-shaped g-spot vibrators spiked.

Women (and their partners) embarked on a quest more challenging than that of the Holy Grail. (Those who’ve read Dan Brown’s DaVinci Code know what an apt analogy that really is.) And women who, after much experimentation, still could not find their g-spot were left feeling somewhat inadequate. If only they had known…

What is the g-spot?
The g-spot is believed to be a quarter-sized (some say nickel-sized) spot of tissue about 1/3 of the way up the vaginal wall on the anterior side (toward the belly). Stimulation of this spot in some women leads to intense orgasms and, sometimes, female ejaculation.

Researchers at the University of L’Aquila found through ultrasound that women who experience vaginal orgasm are statistically more likely to have thicker tissue in this area of the vagina, lending credence to the existence of an actual, physical g-spot.

The Latest Findings
Not so, say the latest findings, also published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.
Granted, the 2008 research was on flimsy ground. The  research group was too small.  The research methods were faulty.  The evidence was inconclusive.

The new study, which surveyed 902 sets of twins, discovered the g-spot actually does not exist…

Um. Come again?

Since identical twins are genetically identical, if one claimed to have a g-spot, the other would be likely to, as well. This was not the case. The survey findings, according to the researchers, suggest there is no genetic basis for the existence of the g-spot.

However, in the same study, 56 % of the women said they do, in fact, have a g-spot.  The researchers say environmental and psychological factors may contribute to certain women having intense orgasms when this area is stimulated.

Does it matter?
After the 2008 study was released, some women may have felt inadequate if they (or their lover) could not find their g-spot. This latest study may assuage those concerns. You can’t find it because it doesn’t exist.

But what about those of us who know, in fact, that Good Things happen when something (a finger, a vibrator…) stimulates that spot about 1 to 3 inches up in the vagina? Are we the crazy ones now?

It’s quite possible, as Greg Laden points out in his science blog, that the g-spot exists but has no basis in genetics. It could also mean that every woman does, in fact, have a g-spot but the 44 % of women who said they didn’t have one simply haven’t been able to find theirs.

While the most recent study uses a larger sampling than the 2008 study, the research methods still aren’t the most reliable. Sex educator Dr. Petra Boynton, in her blog “Where Have All the G-Spots Gone,” does  a wonderful job tearing apart the study, so I’ll let her have at it.

Meanwhile, my thoughts…

Don’t stop looking
Perhaps all women have this spot (sometimes thought to be urethral sponge) but not all women have the same response when it is stimulated. After all, every woman varies in what she likes. Some women don’t like direct clitoral stimulation. Other women can orgasm simply from having their nipples played with.

Even the same woman, on a different day, may enjoy different sexual pleasures. And the same thing that turned her on one night may be downright painful the next. (Sorry, guys… that’s what makes us so intriguing!)

If you’re in that percentage of women who has not yet found your g-spot, I encourage you to continue the hunt, regardless of what this week’s scientific study says.

Just don’t pursue your search at the expense of other sexual pleasures. After all, the more you explore your body, alone or with a lover, the more ways you will discover to orgasm.

And for those women who know beyond a doubt their g-spot exists, might I suggest buying it a special toy?

It’s the first full week of the New Year. That means it’s not too late to make a New Year’s Resolution! I hope no one has actually broken any of theirs yet, unless they were the kind meant to be broken. (Like giving up sex in 2010… definitely a bad idea!)

So, dear readers, what are your New Year’s Resolutions? I’m sure we have the lion’s share of “quit smoking,” “lose weight” and (my personal favorite) “quit procrastinating.” In 2010, your resident blogger has made a resolution to keep this blog up-to-date with exciting, fun and sometimes educational content – just for you.

In that vein, here are some suggestions for New Year’s Resolutions you won’t mind keeping all year long!

1. Do something new with your lover. You can break open the Kama Sutra and play with whatever position strikes your fancy, have sex outdoors, or make a foray into BDSM. Whatever you choose, do something that is a new experience for both of you.

2. Communicate with your lover. Take time, inside the bedroom or out, to reveal your innermost fantasies. What do you love best about his techniques? What do you wish he’d do more often? Here’s a tip, ladies – long talks during car drives work well. The lack of eye contact makes your man more comfortable and it helps that he has something else to focus on while still giving you the attention you need (and deserve!)

3. Buy a new toy. Expand your bedroom repertoire with the help of a new battery-powered friend. Go for something completely different. If you’ve never used a rabbit-style vibe, I recommend the new WOW series. Want something great for anal play? The Slimline Anal Explorer is a great beginner vibe at a great price.

4. Have more sex. Who couldn’t use a little more love in their life? Make arrangements for lunchtime rendezvous, quickies before breakfast, or long Saturday evening romps through every room in your house. If you’re an “only on weekends” couple, add a weekday into the mix. If you currently have sex once a week or less, aim for two or three times, just for a month, to see how you like it.

5. Make (and keep) a weekly date night. After the hubbub of the holidays, everyone begins to settle back into their normal routine. Why not make a weekly connection with your lover part of your regular 2010 schedule? If you have kids, line up a babysitter. If not – you have less of an excuse.

Date night doesn’t have to be expensive. Order Chinese food and then give each other massages by the fireplace. Use your imagination for low-cost, stay-at-home one-on-one time or splurge with a dinner out at your favorite restaurant. You can decide who, er – what’s – for dessert.

6. Do kegels. Kegels – easy little exercises that tone the PC (Pubococcygeus) muscles have well-documented health benefits. Not only do they help prevent incontinence, they can aid in childbirth. They also help women have more intense orgasms. You can do kegels anywhere, at any time (and no one will know). You can also use ben wa balls for a more intense experience.

7. Use a condom. If you’re not in a monogamous relationship, make 2010 the year you vow to practice safe sex with every partner and use a condom. You’ll find so many fun varieties here at Vibrator.com, you can even use a different style, color or flavor every day of the year!

Aren’t the holidays a romantic time of year? Let’s forget the crowded malls, endless piles of presents to wrap, and our dwindling bank accounts. Pass the spiked egg nog and let’s focus on the mistletoe and the crackling fire.

For couples celebrating Christmas together, Christmas Eve is the perfect night to set aside time for nooky near the tree. Just be careful where you roll; you don’t want to crush the Nativity scene. Here are some more ideas to really rock your lover’s jingle bells.

Role play – Santa and Mrs. Claus, a few naughty elves… bring on the garb and make it a very Merry Christmas. Don’t forget to take a few photos that you can enjoy throughout the year.

Play a fun (and silly) sex game – Turn on one of your favorite Christmas classics, but give it a grown-up twist while you watch. Write up cards with foreplay acts on them – or use these “dirty” dice. Then roll the dice or draw a card every time Rudolph’s nose lights up or Snoopy enters the scene. Use your imagination. You each get to open one of your presents early if you actually make it through all 23 minutes of the Christmas special before having sex.

Take in a (private) movie – My husband and I have a tradition of opening one gift each on Christmas Eve. Inevitably, I give him a DVD, ensuring some quiet couples time for the rest of the night as we snuggle in front of the roaring fireplace to watch a movie. Why not follow our tradition but make it an X-rated selection? I particularly like plot-driven films made for couples, with big name stars like Jenna Jameson in Cover to Cover.

Enjoy a toy that didn’t come from Santa – If movies aren’t your thing, why not gift your lover with a unique and adventurous couples sex toy, and spend the rest of the evening playing? A vibrating cock ring or a wireless remote control vibe make great couples toys!

Breakfast in bed – We all remember racing out of bed Christmas morning to see what treats Santa left for us. But we’re mature adults now, with more patience. And we know good things come to those who wait.

If you’re one of those lucky couples without kids, linger in bed Christmas morning and enjoy a decadent breakfast: French toast with gooey syrup or sticky cinnamon buns. Don’t forget the fresh strawberries and whipped cream; strawberries are shown to be an aphrodisiac.

You can prepare the French toast in the evening and simply bake until golden brown… We’re sure you can find something to do while breakfast is cooking.

I also liked Michael Webb’s tips for 12 Romantic Days of Christmas. Select a few of these to spice up your holiday celebration!

There’s one thing members of both major political parties agree on: The U.S. needs some type of health care reform. From there, though, opinions diverge wildly.

The 2,032-page bill introduced by House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) outlines a national healthcare plan with some very good points. For instance, the bill:

• prevents insurers from denying coverage to people with pre-existing conditions
• caps personal financial liability when someone faces a medical emergency
• prevents insurers from dropping people who become ill

Two of the key sticking points in the plan passed in November by the House of Representatives and now facing the Senate are – not surprisingly — sex education and abortion funding. The old adage rings true: in the end, it always comes around to sex.

Sex education, not abstinence teaching, supported
One provision of the bill, titled the “Healthy Teen Initiative to Prevent Teen Pregnancy,” supports taxpayer funding of sex education proven, through evidence-based research, to:

• delay sexual activity in teens;
• decrease the number of sexual partners;
• reduce teen pregnancy;
• reduce sexually transmitted infection rates; or
• improve rates of contraceptive use.

Abstinence-based programs, all the rage in many schools recently, will not be supported by tax dollars. According to some sources, the provision considers the abortion drug RU-486 as “contraception,” along with Plan B (the morning-after pill), IUDs, birth control pills and condoms.

Taxpayer-funded abortions nixed
While the conservative community may have lost the battle over sex education, an amendment to the bill barring federal funding for abortions, however, can be viewed as a conservative victory. In fact, it’s much more than that — it’s politicians listening to the majority of their constituents based on poll results.

A CNN poll showed that 61% of Americans (across all political parties) oppose using public funds to cover abortion. Thirty-seven percent are in favor of taxpayer-funded abortion. Slightly more than half believe all abortions should be paid for out of pocket, rather than through any insurance at all.

It’s interesting to note, however, that of respondents to a Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life survey, only 3 % cited abortion funding as a reason to oppose health care reform. Yet our legislators have turned this into a hot-button, make-or-break issue.

What do opponents really dislike about the bloated health care reform bill? The two highest-ranking responses, tied at 27 % each, were: “it’s too expensive” and “don’t want government involved in health care.”

When you consider the post office, Department of Motor Vehicles, Social Security and other government-regulated programs, it’s amazing the numbers for the latter response weren’t higher.

I firmly believe Americans need to take more responsibility for their health as a whole, in the form of healthy eating, frequent exercise, and common sense wellness care. But if I do get sick, I don’t want the government in charge of the tools that can assist me in healing. This firmly overrides any other issue relating to the health care reform bill, all of which seem to make sizzling headlines.

Health care reform good for LGBT Community
Too much government involvement aside, there are a few bright points to the legislation. One provision eliminates the hefty tax penalties non-married partners — a large percentage of which are gay or lesbian — face when they put their partner on their health insurance plan. As someone who lived with my (opposite sex) partner nearly seven years before we got married, this makes all sorts of sense to me. Marriage, again, should be a personal choice based on love, not economics.

Additionally, the bill prohibits discrimination in health care based on “personal characteristics extraneous to the provision of high quality health care or related services.” This includes gender and sexual orientation.

Certain parts of health care reform are on the right track. But the question remains: Will the bill pass before 2009 ends?

Where do you keep your vibrators and other sex toys? For a long time, I kept mine on the nightstand. But having a toddler in the house that is becoming increasingly aware of her surroundings has made me re-think this plan.

You can easily tuck vibrators away in dresser drawers, nestled beneath sweaters and underwear. In all likelihood, no one will find them. But lint from sweaters sticks to jelly vibes, meaning you have to clean them very well before use. (And cleaning lint from a jelly vibe that’s not waterproof can be quite a hassle!)

If you’re opting for a bedroom drawer, wrap any vibrator in a lint-free hanky or, better yet, keep it in a silk pouch designed for toy storage.

Here are some other “Dos” for vibrator storage:

• Store vibes in a dry, dark, cool place. Sunlight can fade or possibly even melt some vibes. Heat and humidity can damage the electronics and promote growth of bacteria.

• Remove batteries before storage.

• Clean vibrators after use to inhibit the growth of bacteria – and so they’re clean for next time!

Storage Boxes for your Vibrator
Vibrator.com sells storage cases for your sex toys, like this large lockable box with keyless entry from BMS Enterprises.  This case looks like a train case or storage chest, which means you can keep it on your dresser without incident, funny looks or questions from anyone who may see it. I’d still recommend storing it out of sight if you have children – unless you have an amazing but believable story prepared for the inevitable query: “What’s in that box, Mom?”

If you frequently travel with your vibes, you may opt for this faux-leather soft case from For Your Nymphomation. Measuring a foot long, it holds all but the biggest of dildos. (You won’t be able to cram Doc Johnson’s 16-inch giant cock with balls into this one easily.) This case stores unobtrusively in a closet or drawer, and has a lock with two keys.

Have a lot of large toys? The XL faux leather hard case from For Your Nymphomation measures 18 inches high and 12 inches across to hold your entire collection – even that giant cock.

The lockable case (with two keys) includes six clear pouches attached to a long Velcro strip so you can store toys separately, and six loops with Velcro to hang items (such as paddles or floggers). A lower pouch with elastic lets you stow condoms or less “personal” items.

The separate pouches for toys are great because storing toys together can damage them. For instance, metal or plastic toys can scratch if left to bang around together in a case, and jelly vibes can get stuck together. Mixing toys of different materials together can actually cause materials in some toys to break down or get stained and discolored. For best results, if you use a case without separate compartments, wrap each sex toy in a lint free cloth before placing it in your toy box.

Finally, I can’t resist sharing this all-purpose faux leather case, again from F.Y.N. It looks like a briefcase and holds up to eight DVDs in their cases, a two-inch stack of magazines, or enough sex toys for a weekend getaway. As long as you check your luggage when you fly, no one will be the wiser about what’s inside.

I really wanted to broach the subject of STDs in Washington, D.C. with a tongue-in-cheek approach. (I’m not doing anything more fun with my tongue at the moment.) I had a whole series of bi-partisan jokes lined up, poking fun at political personalities from Clinton to Ted Kennedy to Elliot Spitzer…

Then I thought better of it. It’s really not a laughing matter. In fact, it’s pretty sad.

D.C. beats all 50 states for cases of Chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis
Our nation’s capital has a higher concentration of STDs than anywhere else in the U.S., according to a new report released by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

Washington D.C. has higher rates of Chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis, with:

- 451.5 cases of gonorrhea per 100,000 people
- 24.8 cases of syphilis per 100,000 people; and
- 1,177 cases of Chlamydia per 100,000 people.

The Chlamydia rate in D.C. is nearly three times the rate of neighboring Virginia and Maryland.

Indicative of larger problems
It’s easy – almost cliché – to blame politicians with a penchant for interns and prostitutes, but the reality is, STD rates are higher in major cities across the U.S.

Other problems plaguing major urban areas also plague D.C. For instance, Washington D.C. also leads the pack in violent crime, and some statistics show that more than 14,000 people in our nation’s capital are homeless.

Sadly, these statistics don’t share any “breaking news.” They only drive home some obvious points:

- More sex education may help combat the spread of STDs.
- A better healthcare system can diagnose and treat individuals before they perpetuate more disease.
- How can we expect our politicians to serve an entire country when they can’t take care of problems right on their doorstep?

Teen girls also at risk
Nationwide, according to the CDC report, teen girls show the highest rates of  Chlamydia and gonorrhea, with more than 400,000 girls ages 15 – 19 infected with one or both of the STDs.

Left untreated, 10 to 20 % of these infections can result in pelvic inflammatory disease, which can cause chronic pelvic pain, ectopic pregnancies and infertility in women.

The prevalence of these STDs in teenage males was slightly lower – probably due to increased screening and diagnoses for teenage girls. Additionally, the long-term health risks for females who contract the disease are much worse than for men, in general. The U.S. population aged 15 to 24 years old, both male and female, are most at risk to contract STDs. The CDC report estimates approximately 19 million new STD infections each year, with almost half of those amongst people age 15 to 24.

Sex education, condom availability the keys
Educating high school and college students about the importance of safe sex can help combat the spread of STDs. At home, an open-door policy regarding discussions about sex with your teens can help.

It’s especially important for teenage girls to feel as if they can talk to their mothers about delicate sexual matters, as early diagnosis and treatment with antibiotics of common STDs can help prevent future health problems and infertility. Whether that discussion involves a conversation about sex toys or not is a personal decision…

Sex expert Dr. Laura Berman recommends women buy vibrators for their teenage daughters.

“You’re teaching them about their own bodies and pleasuring themselves,” Dr. Berman said on a segment of Oprah this past spring. “They don’t need [a] boy – they don’t need another person — until they’re ready.”

She went on to say that using a vibrator may even make teenage girls safer, sexually-speaking, because it may encourage them to put off their sexual experience even longer.

Oprah’s best friend, Gayle King, shook her throughout the segment, arguing that it is “just too much information.” Kids are growing up fast enough, these days, she argued. Parents don’t need to add battery-operated fuel to the raging teenage hormonal fire.

The thought crossed my mind that, upon discovering how good sexual pleasure can feel with a vibrator, teenage girls may actually be more eager to find out about the real thing. (Only to be sorely disappointed by a first experience with an inexperienced boy their own age, of course… sending them running back to their vibrator… maybe Dr. Berman has the right idea?)

Dr. Berman says it’s about empowerment – teaching teens not only the basics of sex as well as how to be safe, but educating them about orgasm. Which we all know is an important part of sex. But I’m still not sure about vibrator-shopping with a teenage daughter.

Talking to Teens About Sex
I remember learning about masturbation from Judy Blume books. A few years later, I started learning about sex from Danielle Steele. We did not talk about sex in my house – at all. While my mom knew exactly what I was reading (after all, she read Danielle Steele and Nora Roberts, too) we never discussed it.

I know this is an extreme situation – the polar opposite of what today’s experts recommend. Certainly, I agree that parents should teach their teens about sex: the basic mechanics, safe sex for protection against disease and pregnancy, and the importance of not giving into peer pressure.

It’s also important to talk about the emotional connection forged after sex, which may surprise teenage girls who don’t fully understand the difference between love and lust; sometimes, those “feel-close” hormones can even throw grown women for a loop after a casual encounter.

Girls are giving blowjobs at 13 and 14 years old. (Note to the experts: Surprise! This is NOT a new phenomenon!) So it’s wise for parents to explain that STI’s can be transmitted through oral sex and condom use is important. Parents shouldn’t just pretend it’s not happening or even that it’s an atrocity.  It happens, has been happening probably since the dawn of time, and will continue to happen.  Sex education in schools, one-on-one conversations  at home, and buying sex toys for our teens won’t change that. The best we can do is educate teens on how to be safe and protect against disease and pregnancy. Well, that or chastity belts.

A Vibe for your Teen?
While I’m very much in favor of sex education and parents talking to their kids about sex, I also agree with Gayle King that to buy a teenage girl a vibrator is, indeed, “TMI.” I think discussions with teens about sex should lean toward the practical and the clinical. Of course, if a teenager has any questions, they should be answered open and honestly, and parents should make it clear that their kids can come to them with questions.

But I can imagine only one reaction if my mother ever brought up the topic of vibrators, masturbation or the specifics of orgasm: complete mortification. I can’t imagine it would be comfortable for many teenagers – or their parents. And I don’t see many benefits to it.

With all due respect, I think Dr. Berman is not giving enough consideration to the other reasons teenagers have sex, including the same reason vibrators don’t replace real-life lovers for grown-ups. Whether you’re 14 or 40, a sex toy—while fun—can never replace the intimacy of sex with someone you love (or even like a whole lot!)

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