Last Valentine’s Day I almost died of a broken heart! I fell into a category of people I had never hoped to join…the Valentine’s Day Break-up Crew. My ex and I officially ended our relationship on Valentine’s Day, just as the clock struck midnight! Welcome to heartbreak…welcome to hell…welcome to the single life…AGAIN!!!
So here I am, one year later. I am stronger…I am for the most part healed…I am certain there is someone out there for me. Now…where do I find him? I figured…I am a hip and modern dame…I’ll try something I never did before. I ventured into the world of internet dating…and that is when I knew I had really arrived…into the next level of post break up nightmare!! So here’s the scoop my sexy friends…I have now officially tasted a smorgasboard of internet dating sites, and here are my impressions of what lurks out there in cyberspace for those seeking Cupid’s arrow to come their way…
1) People Lie! OK…maybe I am a bit naive…but the extent of the lies is just ridiculous. I met a perfectly nice gentleman for an afterwork cocktail a few months back. I was so lucky I found him in the near empty bar…the photo he posted was at least 15 years old! I was looking for someone with hair. This was a good lesson…I now know how to translate the little nuances into truths…meaning: “a few extra pounds” is usually a good indicator of obesity…oh and by the way…”living with roomates” translates into “mom’s basement”!!!
2) People are shallow. OK…all I have to say on this matter is…if I read one more posting from a semi good looking guy who swears he is looking for a down to earth, sweet and cute, intelligent and real woman…regardless of what she looks like because now he is really ready to get serious with a real woman…I am going to puke…or punch my monitor! These are usually the same guys who have dressed their arm with a super tall, super thin, insanely airheaded young girl. I am now 100% certain that these desireable people do not even exist. I am now 100% certain that the dating sites have created these profiles just so that you join…thinking that you actually have a chance at attaining a deep and intimate relationship with someone so attractive. I swear…that’s why they never write back…yeah that’s it…
3) People are desperate. Does that mean I am desperate as well? Well…yes…it does. It’s what people are desperate for that divides them on the internet. Depending on which dating site you fork your money over to, you get a plethora of desperate searches: the old standard…desperate for sex (my personal favorite!)…desperate for marriage…desperate for a friend…desperate for someone to acknowledge your existence. Desperation is a very interesting motivator. The results are astounding…that’s all I have to say on that.
4) People are searching for the unattainable. It’s so easy to sit behind your computer screen and dream up your perfect mate. It’s a fun game to concoct the perfect love and then try to force some enticing photograph to fit the mold. But it’s unfortunately a far stretch from reality.
All of this brings me to my real point…all ya need is love…SELF LOVE. I have officially thrown my very last $40 down the drain…sinking into the reservoir of internet dating hopefuls…more like suckers! I have decided to take that forty bucks and go treat myself to some self love. I don’t lie, I am not shallow, I have broken my addiction to desperation and finally…I stopped searching. This Valentine’s Day it’s me and BOB! A match made in heaven…

Happy Valentine’s Day lovers!

Hugs and Kisses,

Sally

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