One Good Reason to Lock Up Your Vibes

Have you ever had an embarrassing vibrator incident? Perhaps you didn’t remove the batteries and you found the toy turned on when you picked up your checked bags at the airport. Or maybe you left a dildo out when the cleaning lady came over. If you play with vibrators frequently, you probably have at least one embarrassing sex toy incident.

When you’re a parent, these embarrassing moments may involve kids.

Most parents of toddlers know what a challenge it is to find a few minutes alone to go to the bathroom. While he was watching his two-year-old son, my friend Jordan had to go. He brought his son into the master suite with him, closing the bedroom door so his son could wander in the bedroom while Jordan did his business in the attached bathroom.

Jordan knew there wasn’t anything in the master bedroom his son could get hurt on. But the room hadn’t exactly been babyproofed, either. It wasn’t long before Jordan heard dresser drawers and cabinet doors opening and closing.

Jordan began having misgivings about the idea but it was too late for him to get up and do anything about it. Then he heard a telltale buzzing sound. Then he heard his son giggle.

Yes. His toddler had found the wife’s vibrator. Buzz. “Giggle.” Buzz. Buzz. Child’s laughter.

From the bathroom, Jordan began calling his son. “Come here, kiddo. Let me see what you have there. Can you show it to Daddy?”

Of course, the more you want a toddler to do something, the less inclined he is to do it. Children sense this. They also somehow know when a parent is helpless to stop them. Jordan began looking around frantically for something to divert the boy’s attention. He found a toilet paper roll. “Come here, son…”

The boy stepped closer, still playing with the buttons on the vibe and giggling at the funny sounds. This new toy was far more interesting than a toilet paper roll. The boy stood just out of reach of Jordan, who was still pleading with the boy to give the item to Daddy.

Then, of course, Jordan’s son got ready to do another thing toddlers often do. Jordan leapt up from the bowl, trying to catch the boy and grab the vibrator. The toddler stood poised with the sex toy, still buzzing, in front of his open mouth, ready to give it the toddler taste test.

If this isn’t reason enough to buy a locking case for your vibrator collection, I don’t know what is. Even if you think you don’t have to lock up your toys because no one besides you and your partner ever enter the master bedroom and if they do, they surely won’t be rummaging through your dresser drawers — I’m sure Jordan thought the same thing.

Seven Tips to Better, Safer Cybersex

“I’m going to have you all over the Web!” I uttered to a close friend.

Um, wait… that wasn’t exactly what I meant, and knowing the friend is an author of erotica, my words took on a whole new meaning. I was really just interviewing her for a writer’s blog, since she recently signed on as editor at a publishing company and just got proofs of her first published erotic short.

But if you choose to “have” someone (in the sexy sense of the word), the Web has plenty of venues in which to do so. My preference is plain old cybersex through a text-based chat interface of your choice — Digsby, Facebook, AIM … G-Talk is my favorite, but only because of the innuendo in its name.

Cybersex is easy and relatively safe. You can’t transmit or receive STDs, and don’t have to worry about condoms, pregnancy, or even cleaning up a mess on the sheets (okay, well maybe the last one!) Here are a few tips to have better, safer cybersex.

1. Set the stage with strong imagery. While words can be sexy, pictures bring our fantasies to life. That’s why porno DVDs sell so much better than erotic novels. Create a picture in your cyber-lover’s mind with your words. Tell the  tale of what you’re wearing — except if it’s flannel pants and a baggy sweatshirt. Then use your imagination to make up the sexiest outfit you can think of, and describe it in glorious detail. That’s one great thing about cybersex — he’ll never know you’re fibbing!

2. Don’t let typos and “net-speak” distract you or your cybersex partner. Proper spelling makes a smoother read for everyone. And how much longer does it really take to type “your” instead of “ur?”    In fact, most people over age 18 actually have to take more time to convert appropriate spelling into net-speak in our minds before we type. It’s easier to spell out most words. On the other hand, don’t obsess over correct grammar. Just do the best you can and get lost in the moment. Your lover will know what you mean.

3. Be explicit. The hottest cybersex I ever had involved a play-by-play interaction of exactly what I’d do to my lover — and what he’d do to me. We held nothing back, describing everything from the first caress to our mutual, and simultaneous, orgasms.

4. Be creative. Cybersex is a fabulous form of fantasy. Don’t worry if it’s nothing you’d actually want to do in person — you can still talk about it. I’ve had sexy conversations with my lover discussing acts I’m not quite ready for, but are fun to think about! By the same token, there’s no reason to bring the conversation around to anything that makes you uncomfortable. You can steer things in the right direction by sayer (er, typing) “How about we…?”

5. Don’t reveal personal details. I’m not going to be judgmental. Some people have cybersex with strangers. If you do, be careful not to reveal personal details. It’s okay to share the color of your underwear or your favorite sex position, but don’t reveal where you live, for instance, or your place of business or your favorite hangout. You don’t know if the person on the other end of your broadband connection could be a stalker.

6. Better yet, stick with people you know in real life. When you play on the ‘net, you never know what you’re getting. Forty-year-old men can pretend to be 22-year-old porn stars. By the same token, 14-year-old girls can also pretend to be 22-year-old porn stars. And police officers can pretend to be 14-year-old girls pretending to be 22-year-old porn stars. (Got that?) You can get in serious trouble having cybersex with a minor — or someone you believe to be a minor. It’s safer for a variety of reasons to stick to having cybersex with people you know in real life.

7. Webcams add another element to cybersex. If you’re having cybersex with someone you already know, setting up the webcam can really spice it up. Besides, it’s a great way to make sure no one is playing false identity games. Alternately, you can create an avatar in Second Life and have an affair of endless possibilities through your online persona. But that’s a post for another day….

Weird Sex News from around the World (and Beyond)

It’s a weird, wild, sexy world out there. We cover a lot of “off-the-beaten-path” sex topics on this blog, from swingers to fetishes, but some of the sex news I’ve seen around the Web lately makes this adventurous blogger feel downright vanilla.

Mistaken Identity
In Toronto, a man is being tried for rape after having sex with his twin brother’s lover. The case is in court right now. The woman claims she didn’t know it was not her lover, but his twin, when he climbed into bed with her after a party to take a nap. She instituted sex, beginning by caressing him. He claims he told her who it was. She says she used her lover’s name several times, and he did not correct her. She consented to sex by her actions, he says.

When he turned on the lights, she realized who he was and ran out of the room screaming. Apparently, the twins were not identical — but close enough for rock and roll, as the saying goes. The article does not say whether or not the woman and her lover’s twin used a condom.

The World’s Largest Condom
You caught me. That last line was just an easy segue into this next bit: a giant flying condom. If you see something strange flying the friendly skies of France, it might just be the 120-foot long CondomFly. By the end of this year, the condom-blimp will begin a 100-city tour to promote World AIDS Day. It carries four people, including a pilot and is, perhaps, the first safe sex alternate for another over-sized French contribution to the world: the Statue of Liberty.

Don’t Bring a Pussy Cat to a Dog Show
While a Helium-filled flying condom is a pretty good marketing tactic to promote safe sex, I think this streaker may need a quick lesson in “knowing your audience.” He interrupted a dog show in Birmingham, England, just for the thrill. I can understand the psychology behind streaking — obviously, streakers want attention. But wearing a cat loin cloth over your sausage at a dog show? That’s just inviting trouble.

Man Arrested for Masturbating in Public Library
For some people, it’s dogs, for others it’s…pro wrestling? A man in Burlington, Kentucky, was arrested in the Boone County Public Library for allegedly masturbating at a computer terminal. But it wasn’t porn on the screen, at all — he was watching pro wrestling videos.

Pornographic Postal Theft
At least the Boone County man had the good graces to get his masturbating material without stealing. A Peterborough, U.K.-based postal worker was caught stealing sex toys, pornographic DVDs and lingerie from people on his delivery route for the past 10 years, according to this article in the Telegraph. Police raided his former home to find a hefty stash, including the receipts. The postal worker would open a box containing a large order, steal one item, and then re-seal the box for delivery.

This seems a good time to remind everyone that all orders from Vibrator.com are discretely shipped in plain packaging, so family members, neighbors — and unscrupulous postal workers — won’t be able to identify the contents, let alone know if they’re worth stealing!

How to Hold a Sexy Photo Shoot

While women often have hang-ups about their looks, especially in the bright light conditions required for a photo shoot, I don’t know of any man alive who doesn’t drool at the thought of his lover memorialized in semi-compromising, or simply sexy, positions.

Case in point: I recently complained to a male friend of mine that my hair had gotten way too long and I wouldn’t be appearing in any photos until I got it cut.

“Ooh, sexy,” he replied. “More to grab onto.”

See what I mean?

So, ladies, set aside your inhibitions and give your man a special treat – let him take your picture – over and over again. We’re ready here at Vibrator.com with tips to get over your shyness and look your best!

Take it slow.
Don’t want to pose in your birthday suit the first time out? Totally understandable. Start with an outfit that makes you feel good – from a business suit to a little black dress. Then unbutton a few buttons, life the hemline or pull down a strap, and take it from there. Fully-clothed can be just as sexy as seeing all nine yards. The key is to be comfortable.

Use appropriate lighting.
Flashes are decidedly unsexy. Better DSLR cameras let you adjust the F-stop to let in more light, so you can take photos in low light conditions without a flash. But that’s getting too technical for most people, who might be using a point-and-shoot digital camera. (Did you zone out when I said f-stop?)
If possible, take photos in natural daylight… but don’t stand next to the window. There’s an obvious reason for that (unless you’re an exhibitionist) but there’s an artistic reason, as well. Light creates harsh shadows, and, in most cases, harsh shadows on a model’s face (and the curves of her body) is decidedly unsexy. Instead, use a reflector – a white card, white sheet, shiny metallic surface or a mirror to reflect light from the original source. Keep the light source in front of the model.

Pose at an angle.
Professional models and Hollywood superstars use this technique all time. Never stand straight ahead facing the camera. Instead, stand partially sideways, with one foot in front of the other. Point your toe toward the camera, putting your weight on your back foot. For a sexy glance, look slightly away from the camera, or look up at the camera to show off big bedroom eyes. Don’t be afraid to suck in your stomach and puff out your chest – but not too much! Experiment with different poses until you find your favorites – we promise the photographer won’t mind!

Employ the rule of thirds.
This doesn’t have anything to do with threesomes (although I highly recommend them to make a photo shoot even more interesting!) When you take a picture, divide what you can see into nine equal parts (think tic-tac-toe board). The photo’s main subject should fall on or near one of the intersections of those lines to create maximum interest. Do not place the subject in the dead center of the photo.

Frame the shot.
The setting helps to make the picture. Sure, all eyes will be on you (should you choose to show the photos to anyone at all) but pay attention to what’s in the background. It’s all about setting the scene.

Some sexy props to include on camera? A bed with sexy red sheets and rose petals. Sex toys. A carefully arranged plate of fruit, especially strawberry, bananas, mango and papaya. Porn movies on a flat screen. If you get really brave, play with the sex toys, teasing at penetration… or go all the way if you feel inclined.

Most importantly, relax, do whatever feels comfortable, and have fun. Remember, every digital camera has a delete button.

Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree – And Other Sexy Things to Do This Holiday

Aren’t the holidays a romantic time of year? Let’s forget the crowded malls, endless piles of presents to wrap, and our dwindling bank accounts. Pass the spiked egg nog and let’s focus on the mistletoe and the crackling fire.

For couples celebrating Christmas together, Christmas Eve is the perfect night to set aside time for nooky near the tree. Just be careful where you roll; you don’t want to crush the Nativity scene. Here are some more ideas to really rock your lover’s jingle bells.

Role play – Santa and Mrs. Claus, a few naughty elves… bring on the garb and make it a very Merry Christmas. Don’t forget to take a few photos that you can enjoy throughout the year.

Play a fun (and silly) sex game – Turn on one of your favorite Christmas classics, but give it a grown-up twist while you watch. Write up cards with foreplay acts on them – or use these “dirty” dice. Then roll the dice or draw a card every time Rudolph’s nose lights up or Snoopy enters the scene. Use your imagination. You each get to open one of your presents early if you actually make it through all 23 minutes of the Christmas special before having sex.

Take in a (private) movie – My husband and I have a tradition of opening one gift each on Christmas Eve. Inevitably, I give him a DVD, ensuring some quiet couples time for the rest of the night as we snuggle in front of the roaring fireplace to watch a movie. Why not follow our tradition but make it an X-rated selection? I particularly like plot-driven films made for couples, with big name stars like Jenna Jameson in Cover to Cover.

Enjoy a toy that didn’t come from Santa – If movies aren’t your thing, why not gift your lover with a unique and adventurous couples sex toy, and spend the rest of the evening playing? A vibrating cock ring or a wireless remote control vibe make great couples toys!

Breakfast in bed – We all remember racing out of bed Christmas morning to see what treats Santa left for us. But we’re mature adults now, with more patience. And we know good things come to those who wait.

If you’re one of those lucky couples without kids, linger in bed Christmas morning and enjoy a decadent breakfast: French toast with gooey syrup or sticky cinnamon buns. Don’t forget the fresh strawberries and whipped cream; strawberries are shown to be an aphrodisiac.

You can prepare the French toast in the evening and simply bake until golden brown… We’re sure you can find something to do while breakfast is cooking.

I also liked Michael Webb’s tips for 12 Romantic Days of Christmas. Select a few of these to spice up your holiday celebration!

Lace Thongs, Boxer Briefs & Other Underwear Tales

A few friends gathered at my house the other day and the topic of underwear came up.

“Everyone’s got a good underwear story!” my one friend said. But she’s been known to write fan fiction about BDSM elves, so I’m not sure if she falls into that category of “everyone.”

As I thought about it, though, I realized I did have a few. And a few that are fun to re-tell although they’re not mine. So sit right back and you’ll hear a tale (or three)…

“She forgot to add the fabric softener…”

A friend of mine is an elementary school teacher. At the chalk board one day, she noticed something amiss. You might say she had something up her sleeve. She casually maneuvered her hand to pull a black lace thong out the sleeve of her sweater. Blushing, she tucked the thong into her pocket and continued with the lesson.

“He left these at my house…”

Doing laundry one day I came across a pair of boxer briefs that were decidedly not my husband’s. Now, a friend had visited a few months prior, but I’m still not sure how his underwear didn’t make it to the laundry sooner. So I got to make that fun phone call.

“Um, I think you left underwear at my house…”
“Are you sure?” Let’s just say that yes, I do know what his underwear looks like (when he chooses to wear it.) So I was pretty sure.
“Boxer briefs? Dark gray?”
“Yup.”

It just so happened I’d be seeing my friend’s fiancé at another friend’s bridal shower the next week, so, of course, I brought the underwear. I couldn’t resist handing them to her in front of the bride-to-be’s 76-year-old, never-married aunt. “Your husband left these at my house,” I said, resisting a smirk.

She didn’t bat an eye, took them, and thanked me. It’s fun to make people wonder.

“That’s why I’m the cool aunt…”

Last week, my washing machine broke so I went to my sister’s house to do a load of laundry. Just the necessities: socks, underwear, jeans, and lots and lots of baby clothes. When the dryer finished, I brought the basket of clean clothes into the living room where my sister helped me fold them.

My one-year-old daughter decided she wanted to help and began pulling clothes out of the basket and handing them to her cousin, my 14-year-old nephew. First a shirt. A onesie. And then a pink leopard print thong.

He played it cool, getting ready to toss the thong back into the basket without a word when his father pointed it out. “A leopard thong?”

“Is that the baby’s?” my sister asked, not quite sure what was going on.

Um. No.

Why not share your own underwear stories? Everybody’s got one, right?

How to Remove Ben Wa Balls

During a late night in front of the computer, a friend sent me this story,  about a woman with Ben Wa balls stuck in her hoo-ha. (Her words…)

Your resident blogger waits patiently as you read…

Pretty funny, no?

This got me thinking, though… Was this the best way to release those little ben wa balls? And I also couldn’t help but wonder… why didn’t she buy the ones with a string, like the popular SmartBalls. Even  their name is clever. And the strong silicone string permits easy removal.

But, for those more adventurous, who like their balls with no strings attached,  what is the best way to remove ben wa balls on the off chance that they should become stuck?

Incidentally, my experience with ben wa balls tends to agree with blogger Kat’s toy salesperson – gravity does a great job at making sure most women don’t wind up in Kat’s predicament. She truly must, as she proclaims, have a Super Hoo-ha.  I’m only slightly jealous.

But in case you, too, are blessed with a Super Hoo-ha and wind up in the embarrassing situation of two ben wa balls stuck up there without a string, several methods can work to save you any embarrassing phone calls or trips to the doctor.

The most important thing to remember is to relax. In a relaxed state, you have more control over your body, so whichever method you choose to release the ben wa balls will be more effective.

Perform deep breathing exercises, count to ten slowly, or make yourself a cup of tea and go about your day. The balls will come out. It is physically impossible to permanently lose Ben Wa balls inside your body.

Jump up and down. Give gravity a hand by standing up and then jumping up and down. Most people who’ve had issues retrieving their balls noted that this worked. You may feel a bit silly jumping up and down naked (or maybe not…), but weigh the alternatives here…

“Squat and sweep.” Squatting close to the ground, reach into your vagina with one or two fingers and “sweep” the balls out.

Cough, sneeze or laugh. Many women (who haven’t been doing their kegels!) may experience mild incontinence when they cough, sneeze or laugh, because doing so relaxes the PC muscles – those same muscles holding the Ben Wa balls firmly in place. A good cough, sneeze or laugh (I know which of the three I’d choose!) may be all it takes for the Ben Wa balls to drop free.

Squat and push. Any woman who’s given birth naturally knows the way to force something out of your vagina is to “push.” If this action can work for an 8-pound human being, it will definitely work for two, tiny weighted balls. Many sources recommend this as the quickest and easiest way to remove Ben Wa balls that are stubbornly stuck.

With this knowledge, readers can relax and experience the wonder of Ben Wa balls with no worries. How to keep them in when you’re in a vertical position? That’s advice for another article.

6 Sexiest Movies of the 80’s

The world mourned another entertainment icon when Patrick Swayze, 57, lost his two-year battle with pancreatic cancer.

Swayze’s career skyrocketed in 1987 with the release of the sleeper hit, Dirty Dancing. In more recent years, he went into film production and theatre work and also had a continuing role on The Beast television series. IMDB quotes Swayze as saying: “How do you nurture a positive attitude when… statistics say you’re a dead man? You go to work.”

In 1991, he was named Sexiest Man Alive by People magazine. It’s not surprising, then, that Swayze starred in two of what many consider the sexiest movies of that time: Dirty Dancing (1987) and Ghost (1990).

So let’s rewind to the 1980s for a moment – an era when movies began evolving from the subtle onscreen sensuality seen in previous generations to more blatant sexuality. It was the Reagan era: skirts were short, paychecks were large, Madonna danced “Like a Virgin,” and these were the eight sexiest films of the eighties…

Nine and 1/2 Weeks (1986)– In an informal poll, every single person over the age of 35 listed Nine and Half Weeks as the number one sexiest film of the era. I suspect those younger weren’t permitted to watch this film when it was released! With its blatant sexuality and much more than just BDSM “overtones” this movie created scandal when it was first released in 1986. Starring the always sexy Kim Basinger and Mickey Rourke, Nine and ½ Weeks was about as close to soft porn as you could get at that time and still earn an R-rating in U.S. theatres.

Dirty Dancing (1987) – Jennifer Grey’s innocence contrasted with Patrick Swayze’s sheer sensuality epitomized everything a good romance should be. Dirty Dancing entertained us, made us laugh, made us cry, and changed the way we danced. Patrick Swayze also showed off his singing voice in this one; She’s Like the Wind reached #3 on Billboard’s Top 100 and #1 on the Adult Contemporary charts.

Bull Durham (1988) – “I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.” This quote alone places Bull Durham in the number three slot, and also set pretty high standards for make out sessions of the time. Kevin Costner. Susan Sarandon. Baseball. Poetry. Handcuffs. ‘Nuff said.

Footloose (1984) – I honestly can’t think of anything Kevin Bacon was in that wasn’t incredibly sexy on some level, including Waterworld. (You have to love a man who can breathe through his ears.) But this movie launched his career and from those first dance moves to his moving speech in the church, passion is what puts Footloose on my list.

Weird Science (1985) – This one didn’t come to my mind immediately, but in an informal poll enough people endorsed it that I want to add it to the list. Granted, decades later Anthony Michael Hall grew into quite the heartthrob (hey, in a post about the 80s, I get to use words like “heartthrob”) but the film’s real appeal is Kelly LeBrock as the lab-created “Lisa,” who puts the most realistic-looking RealSkin blow-up doll to shame.

Dangerous Liaisons (1988) – The risqué plot involving love games and casual sex puts this one on the list. Hot as can be, with an all-star cast. Michelle Pfeiffer adds to the appeal, although personally, I liked her better as Catwoman in the 1992 Batman Returns.

This list really could go on and on. Honorable mentions include Basic Instinct, American Gigolo, Fatal Attraction and so many others. What’s your favorite sexy movie of the 80s?

Sex-scopes for August

Wondering what the dog days of summer have in store for you? Are you more interested in a poolside rendezvous or an air-conditioned adventures? The Vibrator.com horoscopes let you know what to expect… in bed and anywhere else you may hook up with your lover.

Aries (March 21 – April 19): Temptation reigns during the dog days of summer. Whether it’s a foray into BDSM or a splurge on a new, multi-featured vibe, you’ll yearn to venture where you’ve never gone before. Once you’ve tasted life on the wild side, you may not want to return, either.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20): Things may start to feel dull and lifeless. It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity… and it’s wreaking havoc on your love life, too. Take time to nurture yourself. Light those candles, draw a bath, treat yourself to a decadent new toy, and romance will follow. When you’re feeling more yourself, your nurturing nature will turn your lover into jelly (and that’s a good thing!)

Gemini (May 21 – June 21): It may be wise to forego the pole-dancing or sex swing this month to avoid getting caught in any compromising positions.  Keep it calm and conventional, with an emphasis on love and romance to avoid arguments – or a trip to the emergency room!

Cancer (June 22 – July 22): It’s time to party it up, Cancerians. A vacation may be in the cards; spring for the room with the hot tub and the ocean view! If the opportunity arises to try something new, get to it. Three-some, four-some, public places? Have fun! Anything goes this month.

Leo (July 23 – August 22): Everything you desire will come to you this month, Leo. Single? A long, meaningful relationship may begin. Married? Set your ego aside. Careful negotiations and diplomacy will lead to vigorous and enthusiastic shows of good will … in the bedroom, of course.

Virgo (August 23 – September 22): The normally staid Virgo will let their dominatrix side out this month. That doesn’t mean they can’t show love and reverence, but they may do it with a cat o’ nine tails. Not much will stop Virgos from asserting themselves – better stock up on lube!

Libra (September 23 – October 22): Just make a choice already, Libra! Whatever you decide will be the right thing. You might be considering redecorating your bedroom in lusty shades of red, or maybe you’re reinventing yourself with a whole new look. Whatever you do, your lover will like it.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21): Set your ego aside, Scorpio, and remember that whatever you put out into this Universe is exactly what you will get back. Initiate oral sex and you’ll find yourself in a 69 that rocks your world. If you choose to pout, instead, you’ll find it’s just you and your rabbit vibe tonight.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21): August is all about compromise, give and take, share-and-share alike for Sagittarians. That may sound dull, but it’s actually quite refreshing. Play a love game where you fulfill each other’s fantasies, and you’ll discover some new tricks to add to your repertoire for years to come.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19): It’s been a rough month, Capricorn. Problems at work and home mean sex is the last thing on your mind. The solution? Your knight in shining armor, bearing aphrodisiacs of all sorts, will whisk you away to fantasy land – even if all you can afford is a few hours away.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18): Although your birthday is half a year away, Aquarius, you get to party it up this month. Group sex anyone? Indulgence is a beautiful thing, but it’s also likely you’ll be the one cleaning up afterwards, so don’t stay up too late and chill on the Mojitos.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20): It’s time to take the lead, Pisces. You’ve got a partner willing to indulge your every whim, so let your imagination soar. A playful game of truth or dare might lead to roadside sex or a strip club adventure. Take time to appreciate your lover outside the bedroom, too, or it could turn into a lonely month.

Pole Dancing for Fun and Foreplay

Ladies, are you seeking a new way to entice your man (or lady?) in the bedroom? Why not give pole dancing a whirl? This erotic style of dance provides a fabulous upper body workout and a unique foreplay experience.

Vibrator.com’s Desiree Sweet gets the inside scoop on getting started from pole dancing instructor LaylaBeth.

Desiree Sweet: How did you first get into pole dancing?
LaylaBeth: My first twirl around a pole was during a date night with my hubby. We went to a gentleman’s club, and after a little while, he asked the GM if I could get up on stage and dance. I am actually a trained dancer (ballet, jazz, belly dance) so I wasn’t scared of the idea of dancing. That pole, on the other hand, was an interesting accessory! I couldn’t do ANYTHING with it other than hold onto it and walk around a little, so if my curiosity had been SOMEWHAT piqued about the pole prior to that event, it was even MORE piqued after that!

I had heard about a company that did home pole-dancing parties, so, a few months after “Strip Club Night,” as we now refer to it, I contacted the company, ordered a pole and the rest is history!

DS: In addition to being fun and erotic, I’ve heard it’s great exercise, too.
LB: Pole dancing is GREAT exercise for women (or anyone for that matter!) because you really get to build up good upper-body strength. Pole dancing requires that we use our upper body during certain spins, holds and even inverts.

DS: What sort of women do you typically see in your class?
LB: I have seen the whole gamut–younger, college girls looking for a giggle, all the way to women in their fifties who want to let their hair down and strut their stuff a little!  (I even made my own mom come to one of my classes, once!)  My “favorite” students have actually been the older ones—they are typically more comfortable in their own skin and more confident; classes become fun and laidback with that type of energy. I’d say it has been an equal mix of single/coupled ladies. A few recent divorcees, too!

DS: Can anyone learn how to pole dance?
LB: From the bottom of my heart, I DO believe that just about ANYONE can learn to pole dance—at least SOME of the moves!  There are two basic moves I teach in every single class that by the end of the night, EVERYONE can do.  These moves require NO skill other than the willingness to employ a positive attitude!

DS: Anything they should know before they start?
LB: One ABSOLUTELY should warm-up first before attempting any pole maneuvers, so what I do in class is about a 15 minute “regular” exercise period that leads into a little burlesque style dance, and then some simple “struts” around the pole.

We teach barefoot—I won’t even entertain the notion of letting newbies wear “stripper shoes” because a rolled ankle is NOT sexy.

Of course, check with your doctor before starting any exercise program–including pole dancing!

DS: How can women apply the moves they learn in your class in the bedroom?

LB: Women can take a lot of what we learn in class to their bedrooms.  It’s very erotic. I like to include “chair” and “lap dance” techniques with each class, so that even if the lady doesn’t have a pole of her own, she can take what she learns back home with her and show her partner!

Do you wanna try pole dancing at  home? You can buy a pole here. The easy-to-assemble Peekaboo pole kit extends to a height of 6 to 8 feet, and tucks away easily when not in use.

To learn more about LaylaBeth and poledancing, go to http://www.transitionalpoledance.com or http://www.laylabeth.com.