During a late night in front of the computer, a friend sent me this story,  about a woman with Ben Wa balls stuck in her hoo-ha. (Her words…)

Your resident blogger waits patiently as you read…

Pretty funny, no?

This got me thinking, though… Was this the best way to release those little ben wa balls? And I also couldn’t help but wonder… why didn’t she buy the ones with a string, like the popular SmartBalls. Even  their name is clever. And the strong silicone string permits easy removal.

But, for those more adventurous, who like their balls with no strings attached,  what is the best way to remove ben wa balls on the off chance that they should become stuck?

Incidentally, my experience with ben wa balls tends to agree with blogger Kat’s toy salesperson – gravity does a great job at making sure most women don’t wind up in Kat’s predicament. She truly must, as she proclaims, have a Super Hoo-ha.  I’m only slightly jealous.

But in case you, too, are blessed with a Super Hoo-ha and wind up in the embarrassing situation of two ben wa balls stuck up there without a string, several methods can work to save you any embarrassing phone calls or trips to the doctor.

The most important thing to remember is to relax. In a relaxed state, you have more control over your body, so whichever method you choose to release the ben wa balls will be more effective.

Perform deep breathing exercises, count to ten slowly, or make yourself a cup of tea and go about your day. The balls will come out. It is physically impossible to permanently lose Ben Wa balls inside your body.

Jump up and down. Give gravity a hand by standing up and then jumping up and down. Most people who’ve had issues retrieving their balls noted that this worked. You may feel a bit silly jumping up and down naked (or maybe not…), but weigh the alternatives here…

“Squat and sweep.” Squatting close to the ground, reach into your vagina with one or two fingers and “sweep” the balls out.

Cough, sneeze or laugh. Many women (who haven’t been doing their kegels!) may experience mild incontinence when they cough, sneeze or laugh, because doing so relaxes the PC muscles – those same muscles holding the Ben Wa balls firmly in place. A good cough, sneeze or laugh (I know which of the three I’d choose!) may be all it takes for the Ben Wa balls to drop free.

Squat and push. Any woman who’s given birth naturally knows the way to force something out of your vagina is to “push.” If this action can work for an 8-pound human being, it will definitely work for two, tiny weighted balls. Many sources recommend this as the quickest and easiest way to remove Ben Wa balls that are stubbornly stuck.

With this knowledge, readers can relax and experience the wonder of Ben Wa balls with no worries. How to keep them in when you’re in a vertical position? That’s advice for another article.

2 Comments »

1. 

   This story cracks me up!

   Comment by Rick — October 16, 2009 @ 12:13 pm

2. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Vibrator.com, Marne Hansen-Lowell. Marne Hansen-Lowell said: @vibrator_com "How to Remove Ben Wa Balls". The link to the original: this article is hysterically funny! http://bit.ly/1UQzrZ [...]

   Pingback by Tweets that mention How to Remove Ben Wa Balls | Vibrator.com -- Topsy.com — October 16, 2009 @ 1:42 pm

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