Helping Your Lover Get And Maintain An Erection
The penis is a strange creature. It can’t always perform on demand, and while there may be occasions when it seems to have a mind of its own, there are a few ways to encourage it to stand up and be counted.
The greatest sex organ is the mind, and when it comes to getting an erection this is of utmost importance. Expecting too much of a penis can give it stage fright, and too much pressure can kill an erection very fast. If your lover is having trouble getting an erection, remember that a hard cock is not the only way to bliss. Reassure him that there are plenty of other things you can do to have fun – foreplay (for more information we recommend the Foreplay Book) is not just for women and sometimes it can be a delightful end in itself.
Sex therapists sometimes forbid couples who are having sexual difficulties from penetrative sex for a set period – say one month. This relieves any pressure and also encourages both partners to be more imaginative. Be aware that you may find once you’ve agreed to this rule it becomes very hard to stick to!
Another thing to consider is lifestyle – diet, exercise and stress can all have an effect on blood flow and the ability to achieve erections. Alcohol, particularly, can lead to trouble. Try pouncing on your man first thing in the morning to take advantage of his wake-up hard-on, or after he’s been to the gym when his circulation is stimulated. The healthier your man is, the stronger his erections will be.
The physical angle is important too. Are you stimulating your lover in the way he enjoys? When you’re playing with your partner’s penis, remember that there’s more to his cock than a shaft. He may like you to play with his balls (gently), and give some attention to the head of his cock (need more information we recommend the book, Tickle His Pickle). Some men enjoy having you play with their anus or perineum too. Ask him how much pressure feels good – some men like it harder than others. Lubrication can also help increase his pleasure. For the definitive way to discover what he likes, ask to watch him play with himself and pay careful attention. Copy his strokes – and add some of your own to surprise him! There are many toys on the market specifically for prostate stimulation such as Aneros Eupho or the Pandora.
If your partner wants to delay his orgasm, encourage him to stop and start. In between penetration, indulge in some more foreplay to tease both of you to the edge. He can experiment with pushing his balls downwards, which can help delay ejaculation. (If that isn’t enough we recommend the following creams the Prolonging Delay Spray; Prolonging Cream and the Sta-Hard Cream.)
Finally, treat his erections as a joint project, something that you’re both responsible for and that will give both of you a lot of pleasure!
