Strap-On Condom? YUP. Strap-on condom.

So this…invention… is called the Sensis sheath.  It’s a strap-on condom that, as far as I’ve been able to research, is being marketed for those who are too drunk to be able to put on a standard condom.  I guess it’s easier to pull the straps to slide the condom on, rather than simply putting your fingers around the penis to slide it up.

Now, I have a few thoughts about this.  Not the least is that if you’re so drunk you can’t put a condom on you probably shouldn’t be having sex anyway.  If you frequently have sex with people when you’re drunk perhaps you need to look at your drinking habits and/or your behavior while drinking.

At the same time, if you are aware of this behavior and are taking measures to be protected, then that’s good!  I wish more people would be prepared like that.  Reduce unplanned pregnancies, reduce the spread of some venereal diseases and so forth.

This is one of those things that, in my opinion, is both “too much” and a good thing.  I mean, the idea that someone is so drunk they need a strap on condom just proves that they shouldn’t be having sex.  However, if they’re that determined to have sex at least there’s something out there to help them be protected during it.

What are your thoughts about the strap on condom??

EDIT –

After some thought and discussion with other’s it’s come to my thought (and others as the comment shows) is that this could really help persons with disabilities.  If you have dexterity issues, or other issues using your fingers or hands, then this little invention is something that could really help you use condoms, which is a very important thing.

So in this sense, major kudos to the inventor of this product.  I sincerely hope it gets marketing so that those who need it can use it.

Condoms for Elementary School Students?

When it comes to teens, pre-teens and even younger children and sex, policies and ideologies just keep getting stranger and stranger. I reported a few posts back about small condoms targeted at the under-14 set. These Hot Shot condoms are designed to discourage adolescents from unprotected sex while giving them an alternative to adult condoms which may not fit properly.

Now a Massachusetts High School is giving out condoms to elementary school kids on request. The students need to receive counseling from the school nurse or other authorized counselor before receiving the condoms. According to an article in the Provincetown Banner, which was shared at the website WickedLocal.com, some school committee members opposed the policy — but not for the reasons you might think. These members felt kids shouldn’t have to speak with an adult before receiving condoms. One member, Shannon Patrick, was quoted in the article saying, “I don’t like that students can’t be discreet about this….I’d rather them not have the conversation [with counselors] and have the condom than not have the condom.”

The Importance of Sex Ed
I really believe it is important for kids to have a place to turn and an adult to speak with if they are thinking about having sex — especially in elementary school. Even if it’s just a discussion on how to use a condom properly and what a condom can and cannot do to protect students, it’s better than no conversation at all. I would hope the conversation would also include a conversation about the benefits of abstinence, the potential ramifications if the condom should break, and a discussion about the emotional aspects of having sex at such a young age. But, even if the counselors are just explaining how to use the condoms correctly, that’s better than nothing at all.

Sex as Bad as Heroin for Minors?
I’m not a proponent of “abstinence-only” sex ed, and if handing out condoms really does help reduce the numbers of teen pregnancies, I won’t complain. But there’s another part of this rule I do have a serious problem with: the school district will not honor requests from parents that students not be allowed to receive condoms, according to the article.

As a parent, if my child is thinking about having sex — again, especially in elementary school — I want to be the one having the conversation with them. I want to make the determination of whether or not my kid should have access to condoms or not.

One person who commented on the article pondered, “Why not just give the kids free needles while we’re at it…”

I wouldn’t compare drug paraphernalia to condoms, by any stretch. But I do understand the point that the school is taking responsibility for something that should be the parents’ responsibility: education about things that really don’t belong in the hands of minors — or at least not elementary school children.

I don’t want to turn this into another rant-y “What-is-this-world-coming-to,-elementary-school-kids- should-be-playing-with-Hot-Wheels-and-Barbie-dolls” post. But I am very curious to see if the rates of teen pregnancy in the Provincetown school district as a whole drop over the next ten years or so, due to this form of “early intervention.”

Do you think handing out condoms to elementary school students will help decrease the rates of teen pregnancy? Or could it actually increase the numbers of kids having sex?

Four Things You Need to Have a Threesome

With the Britney Spears song “1, 2, 3” running through my brain, I started wondering if threesomes have grown in popularity since the song hit the top 20. Most guys have the dream, whether they admit it or not. If he has testosterone coursing through his veins, chances are he wants to see you with another girl.

If you’re amenable to the suggestion, it’s not an impossible dream at all. And I don’t doubt Britney’s song sparked a few discussions on the topic. But there are four things you absolutely must have for a successful threesome.

1. A third person.

Where can you find another girl (or perhaps even another guy) to engage in a threesome? You have a few choices… Many websites are devoted to swingers, where you can find other people in your area to hook up with. You can hunt down swinger parties in your region, where you’ll meet interesting people, make friends, and hopefully find a third. If “blind dating” of this sort is not your style, you can approach friends, which carries a unique set of challenges.

If you have a friend, you’re going to face the person afterward — whether the night was a success or not. As in any kind of sexual encounter, lots of things can go wrong, including one person feeling neglected. You may also feel as if your relationship is threatened — especially if your partner and your friend had a close friendship previously. After all, the mix of close friendship, intimacy and sex has the makings of a potential relationship. Are you confident enough to recognize that the sex and the friendship can remain as separate elements? (And if not, you may want to reconsider the idea of a threesome at all). Is each party mature enough to recognize the difference between love and lust?

Many threesomes between friends work out very well, and can actually be a beautiful way to strengthen your friendship. But first, consider whether or not you’ll feel “weird” facing the person the next morning.

On the other hand, sex with a stranger or someone you meet through the swinger lifestyle can be illicit, exciting and lots of fun. The big problem is you really don’t know what you’re getting into and sex with a stranger may make you uncomfortable.

2. Lots of confidence.
Before you enter a threesome with your partner, you’ll need to be secure in several ways. You’ll want to believe in the strength of your relationship and understand that sex is fun, but it doesn’t mean he’s going to run off and marry the “third.”

You also need to have a healthy dose of self-confidence in your body. You don’t want to worry that he’s constantly comparing you (unfavorably!) to the other woman.

Finally, you need to understand the give-and-take of a sexual relationship. Sometimes, the emphasis will be on her, sometimes on you, and sometimes on both of you. Sometimes it will shift so you’re both focusing on him. One of the fantastically fun things about a threesome is the different possibilities it presents for sexual acts and positions.

3. Ground rules.
Perhaps you’re perfectly comfortable with him watching while you get it on with your best friend, but there are certain parts of him you don’t want to share. That’s fine, but discuss it beforehand and be honest. Also let the third person know your ground rules — they may have a few of their own.

If someone crosses a line (maybe the possibility wasn’t discussed because you didn’t think of it, or maybe someone got swept up in the heat of the moment), gently and playfully guide them in another direction. As long as you’re nice about it — and create an equally steamy diversion — no one should mind.

4. Condoms.
It’s a good idea for all parties to get tested for sexually-transmitted diseases beforehand and present a clean bill of health. But even if you do, any sex with a non-monogamous, regular partner should involve condoms. If the guy in a threesome switches between girls, he should change the condom each time to prevent the exchange of fluids. You may want to consider dental dams for  oral sex, as well.

The Survivalist’s Guide to Stockpiling Sex Toys

Before the holidays, the Northeast suffered what some people have called the largest snow storm to hit our region in 17 years.  It’s already shaping up to be a long, cold winter.

Of course, the forecast of a blizzard sent people rushing to Wal-mart to stock up on bottled water, batteries, and canned goods. I was lucky enough to grab the last container of milk off the grocery store shelf – not because I was stockpiling, but because I happened to be out of milk. And there was a sale on bread, which explains the six loaves in my freezer. But that’s neither here nor there.

Really… why do people stockpile odd things in the event of a storm? And if we have a power outage, how do they plan to cook all that Campbell’s Chunky soup? I hope they remembered the propane for their camp stove. Wait, what?! Camp stove? You see my point.

Now, your resident blogger and erstwhile survivalist, Desiree Sweet, is here to share the things you REALLY need to stock up on. Because what fun is a snow day unless you can spend it tucked inside where it’s nice and warm?

Four Things Every Sexy Survivalist Needs

Condoms – You don’t want to trudge to the gas station in the middle of a blizzard because you’re down to your last condom, do you? We like this variety pack from Trojan, featuring three each of the Ultra Pleasure, Her Pleasure, and Pleasure Mesh varieties.

How many do you need? First, calculate approximately how many times you have sex each week. Remember, you need a new condom each time you have intercourse, and plan to use two to three times as many as usual during a snow storm or long weekend.

Condoms typically expire about 4 years from the date of production, so you can safely store a year’s supply as long as you remember to rotate your stock. When you buy a new box, place it toward the back of your supply. Older condoms should go in the front and be used first.

Lubricants – Different sex toys and condom materials require different lubricants. For instance, silicone toys should only be used with water-based lubricants. For bath fun, you’ll want a silicone lubricant, since water-based lubricants wash off too easily in the water and don’t provide enough staying power. Keep the following varieties of lube on hand for snowy day adventures:

-    Silicone lubricant – For use with most sex toys, except silicone varieties.
-    Water-based lubricant – For silicone toys
-    Massage oils – Not a lubricant but still important to have for full-body massages after your lover shovels the driveway
-    Warming lubricants – Perfect for those cold winter nights

According to the experts at Cosmopolitan magazine, most lubricants don’t have an expiration date, but it’s smart to use them within a year. I wouldn’t stockpile more than one or two bottles of each variety. Store your lubricants in a cool, dry place and give a quick sniff and look-over before you use them. If anything seems funky, toss it and reach for your back-up bottle.

Batteries – Fortunately, most vibrators are battery-powered, so you can enjoy your toys even in an electrical outage. But you don’t want to steal batteries from your flashlight (or vice versa) during the big storm. Make sure you have plenty of C and AA batteries available (the most common types for most vibes). Rechargable batteries, obviously, are the green solution, but make sure they’re fully charged before the storm hits.

Something to clean up – I love this “after sex towel” but if your power’s out, you won’t be doing laundry. Keep plenty of these in your linen closet, or simply have plenty of tissues on hand for clean up. Perhaps this is where all that bottled water comes in handy.

Rest easy, now that you’re all set for the next sex-filled snow day.

Image is of the F. Y. N. Adult Toybox XL Faux Leather Case courtesy of For Your Nymphomation.

Practice Safe Sex

No, this isn’t a post about condoms. Who knew sex toys in the hands (and other anatomy parts) of certain people could be so dangerous?

TheBayNet.com, a local news Web site covering Calvert, St. Mary’s and Charles County, Maryland, reported that a Maryland woman was airlifted to Prince George’s Hospital after an accident involving a vibrator attached to a reciprocating saw blade. According to the report, the blade (quite predictably) sawed through the plastic toy and severely wounded the woman.

The act, however poorly thought-out, was entirely consensual and no charges were pressed.

My question: If the woman was damaged beyond the ability to procreate any longer, can she be nominated as the only living recipient of a Darwin Award?

But what else do you need to know about sex toy safety? (Aside from the obvious: blades sharp enough to cut through wood and metal should not be used in sex play!)

- Make sure a toy is waterproof before you put it in the water. Hint: if it’s got wires and an A/C adapter, it’s not waterproof! Battery-operated toys will specify on the packaging whether or not they are manufactured for water play.

- Butt plugs have wide bases for a reason. Do not insert them past that base, or you risk a rather embarrassing trip to the ER. And it’s happened. According to this article, in fact, it happens quite often.

- Do not place anything other than a sex toy designed for that purpose into any orifice. That means gerbils, food items (which can cause infections), or anything that could, well, get stuck up there. If you feel an urge to insert anything other than a sex toy, there are vibrators available shaped like cell phones, lipstick tubes, even a rubber ducky (and yes, it’s waterproof!)

- Clean all sex toys well before and after each use. As a general rule, most toys can be cleaned with a wet or damp cloth and mild soap or with an anti-bacterial toy cleaner. Only submerge toys which are waterproof. Read more about how to care for your sex toys here.

- Never use a toy in your vagina that’s been used in your (or someone else’s) ass before cleaning. You risk a nasty urinary tract infection due to bacteria.

- Be aware of the potential hazards of phthalate-based sex toys (often called jelly rubber.) While this flexible, silky material feels great the use pthalates in women of child-bearing age has been linked to birth defects. Additionally, the material, which is porous, can harbor bacteria and other germs. You may want to cover your phthalate-based sex toy with a condom. Carefully inspect all sex toys—but especially phthalate-based toys—for signs of wear or discoloration before use.

- Glass sex toys can crack or splinter. Inspect all glass toys before use. If you drop a glass toy on a hard surface, it is no longer safe to use, as it could crack unexpectedly from the stress of being dropped.

- Candles can be beautiful to create a romantic setting, and if you’re into BDSM, you can do all sorts of fun things with the wax, too. But accidents can happen, so keep a fire extinguisher close by if you are burning candles, and never leave a burning candle unattended. Make sure to extinguish before you fall asleep, as well.

Some of these pointers may seem obvious, but, in the heat of the moment, (or when alcohol is involved in sex play) everyone can use a reminder every once in a while. Be safe and have fun!