Decades ago, fetishists would be incarcerated in asylums for their disorders. Considering the true meaning of the word, that’s not surprising.

A “fetish,” according to its clinical definition, is a sexual disorder where a person cannot get aroused without a particular object, body part, fantasy or behavior. The person may fantasize obsessively about his fetish, sometimes to the exclusion of normal social behavior. That doesn’t sound like fun, does it?

In recent years, though, the word has evolved to encompass many types of unusual, and even some not-so-unusual, sexual behaviors. If you enjoy an activity or appreciate the beauty in a particular body part, but don’t need it during every sexual encounter to get aroused, a so-called “fetish” can be quite fun to explore.
A foot fetish is a common, “mainstream” fetish, if you will. It’s quite easy to see the sensual attraction to feet. After all, what’s not to love about smooth, pampered soles, finely polished toenails, the sensual arc of a woman’s foot and, of course, sexy and powerful stiletto heels? (Just writing this makes me yearn for a pedicure!)

Beach season brings plenty for a foot fetishist to feast upon and enjoy. (And is it just a coincidence that a thong describes a sexy piece of clothing worn in two separate places? Or that low-cut shoes create sensual and revealing “toe cleavage?”)
According to the principles of Reflexology, the foot contains powerful nerve endings that can elicit amazing physical and even sexual responses. Performed by certified reflexologists, it can also treat ailments and diseases.

But you don’t have to be a pro to give a relaxing, sensual foot massage. You may want to study reflexology charts to learn what parts of the foot correspond with different parts of the body. Other than that, a little massage oil and a firm but gentle touch will have your lady swooning.

Approach from the top of the foot, or even her calf, and work your way down, if your lady proves to be too ticklish down there at first. Warm up her feet, too, with some rapid rubbing.

From a simple massage, foot play can progress to even more sensual, playful and arousing experiences. Try toe-sucking, or even a foot job. (Yes, that is exactly what it sounds like.) If you ask your partner to pull on silky stockings, you’ll like the feel of her toes and feet all over your body; you may even be ready to come by the time she gets to the main attraction.
Now, looking at it that way, is a fetish really all that bad?

Does a light smack on the bottom get you wiggling with delight? Have you joked with your lover about being tied up, but never had the nerve to try it? Do pink furry handcuffs seem silly—or sexy? It’s easier than you might think to introduce light BDSM activities into your bedroom!
BDSM stands for bondage & discipline; domination & submission; and sadomasochism (or S&M). BDSM activities evoke intense sexual pleasure through pain, fear or humiliation (or all three) between consenting adults.

As in all sexual activities, trust, communication and safety are paramount.

Experts advise that conversations regarding sex take place outside the bedroom, rather than in the heat of the moment. This is reasonable advice. But I can’t see, “Pass the salt and, oh, I’d like you to tie me up and flog me tonight,” going over well at the dinner table.

Find a time and place that works for you and your partner, whether it’s during a long car ride or at night before you drift off to sleep.

One thing you’ll want to discuss is limits. Maybe you’re comfortable, as a sub,with “anything he wants.” He, on the other hand, is squeamish about doing anything that will hurt you. That’s okay. Plenty of activities don’t involve overt pain, but will evoke desirable, sexy fear and humiliation to satisfy a sub’s cravings. When you make your foray into BDSM, start slow.

A safe word tells the “top” (dominating) partner to stop what he’s doing. It should be a word not normally uttered during play, so it won’t be used accidentally or misunderstood. Some couples use “green,” “yellow” and “red” to indicate “continue,” “continue, slowly,” or “stop.” If you’re using a ball gag, you’ll have to decide on non-verbal cues (or a series of grunts) as a safe “word.”

Whether you’re a top or bottom, BDSM will evoke unique emotions of power and control or fear and pain, respectively. Some subs report that the adrenaline rush dulls the pain while heightening orgasmic pleasure.

A blindfold can create intense anticipation as the sub is left wondering what part of the body might be stimulated next. The loss of sight also intensifies the other senses. The dom enjoys the power and the pleasure of eliciting such extreme ecstasy in his or her sub.

A dom can also take control by restraining his partner with handcuffs, silk ropes or cuff restraints. Many “all-in-one” beginner kits provide the basics to get started.

You may want to try rubber-coated nipple clamps, which create a blend of pain and excitement, or a feather tickler for harmless, yet torturous, fun. Cock rings can be great for male subs, resulting in more intense orgasms…when his Dominatrix finally lets him cum.

If you’ve dreamed of experiencing complete loss of power at the hands of your lover, or being the one in charge during your next adventure, why not give it a try?

STATUEPHILIA

If you’ve ever seen someone looking shifty and rather hot under the collar near David’s larger than life goods at the Accademia in Florence, chances are they are a Statuephile.

Statuephilia, also called agalmatophilia, or Pygmalionism after the myth of Pygmalion, is an uncommon sexual fetish that involves sexual attraction to statues.

But it doesn’t end there, Statuephiles are also aroused by simple blow-up dolls, as well as those new ones that look very lifelike and are made of rubber.

DORAPHILIA

The red carpet and 5th Ave are usually lined with ladies (and men) in fur coats, and while some of us either gush over how great they look, or grind our teeth for the sake of the animals, Doraphiles get turned on by them.

Doraphalia is a sexuoerotic arousal and fetishistic fondness for the smell and feel of animal skin, fur, or leather. In other words, PETA’s worst nightmare.

TRICHOPHILIA

Ever gone to the hairdresser and s/he spent a little too long brushing your hair, it’s a possibility that s/he is a trichophile. Trichophilia is actually a fetish for hair, or new hairstyles. No doubt razor-happy wig-wearing’ Britney is a hot item in Trichophilia circles.

Trichophilia is a fetish in which one becomes sexually aroused by, or is extremely fond of, human hair (usually cephalic); this may be of hair in general or different hairstyles or colors. Arousal may also occur from imagery and physical contact of hair, this including head hair, pubic hair, and axillary hair.

STHENOLAGNIA

We’ve all seen the female body-building competitions and gasped in disbelief at the ladies with all those bulky muscles who look so un-feminine, but Sthenolagnia is a condition where men find that hugely sexually attractive.

Sthenolagnia is a fetish (related to female muscle growth) defined as ’sexual arousal from demonstration of strength or muscles’. The term was coined by the German psychologist Magnus Hirschfeld in the late 1800s. Some activities that might arouse these men include various types of lifts and carries that illustrate different aspects of female strength, muscle worship, wrestling muscular girls, fantasies of rape by muscular women, being used as human dumbbells for women, etc.

SALIROMANIA

Saliromaniacs like nothing more than putting on an evening gown, then rolling around in sty. Anything from dirt to smearing make-up, tousling hair, or ripping clothes is this turn on.

Salirophila is a sexual fetish that involves deriving erotic pleasure from soiling or disheveling the object of one’s desire, usually an attractive person. It may involve tearing or damaging their clothing, covering them in mud or filth, messing their hair or makeup. The fetish does not involve harming or injuring the subject, only their appearance.

Man, I wouldn’t mind slinging some mud at Paris Hilton, but I’d also want her to make an oinking sound too. Maybe that’s another fetish.